A Magical Roleplaying Experience 

Stories taking place in England, Wales, Scotland, Northern Ireland, and the Republic of Ireland.
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 #37666  by Levi Persky
Levi had wondered around, gone to his lab, fell asleep on a sofa at the Inn, but the next night he felt a strong need for some sort of human interaction. He didn't want to go home. He tried Hugh's place, but he was not home. Eventually his wanderings lead him to the home of Kyle Bowden.

Levi knocked on the door, leaning heavily on the frame, waiting for it to open, and when it did? He looked Kyle in the eye and said,

"Can I come in?" he then added in a dull, strained tone, "She wants a divorce. She is leaving me. And she doesn't even want to talk about it. Just wants it over and done so she can move on."
 #37669  by Kyle Bowden
Kyle was having a fairly quiet night, having simply sat down with a book by Lavender Gray.

At the sound of the door, Kyle glanced at the time before pulling himself to his feet and opening the door, furrowing his brows at Levi. He could see something serious was wrong, but as the words entered the air, he looked rather stunned.

"Holy shit. Yeah, come in." Kyle spoke, stepping to the side and closing it behind them. "You want a drink? Tea? Coffee? Er...something stronger?" He asked.

"Er, take a seat, tell me about it."
 #37673  by Levi Persky
"There is almost nothing to tell..." said Levi wearily, entering the room. "She came home late Valentines day, didn't even give more then half a glance at the card and gifts I bought her, then basically launched into telling me she was unhappy, didn't approve of what I did for work, or my hobbies... and by that I think she means the fact I practice medicine, and study actual human bodies to perfect this... So apparently that is a hobby now."

Levi took a seat on the sofa as he said, "A drink would be nice," although he didn't specify. He then said with a shake of his head,

"When she first presented the idea I told her we could work through this, that we needed to give the marriage a chance, we could go to counseling, communicate about issues but... she was determined. Wouldn't consider my words. It's pretty clear this was not spur of the moment. She stared by saying she wanted to discuss it, but she didn't. She wanted me to listen to her reasoning, and then let her go."

Looking down at the floor dejectedly he said, "There were no tears from her, sorrow, she was almost... cold about it at the end. It's as though she has already moved on. And more then that I don't even recognize her any more..."

Levi put his head in his hands. He never would have pictured them ending... but he certainly would not have pictured them ending like this!!
 #37674  by Kyle Bowden
Kyle listened intently as he tended to the drinks. He decided just to make two cups of tea, thinking it better not to encourage alcohol use during the stress as a comfort. Bringing it over, he placed it down in front of Levi before sitting down.

"Well...that really doesn't sound like her." He spoke lamely, lying back in the sofa with his lips pursed in thought. "Makes me almost think like she had prepared for an argument and was more afraid of that than the result. Sometimes people force it all out at once thinking ripping off the plaster will solve the problem, instead of considering pitting warm water on it to ease it away."

He took a breath.

"So she still has problems with your work. Okay. Fine. Fair enough. Regardless of whether that should have been discussed at length before or not, or multiple times at that...that's the issue. But perhaps she doesn't feel she can ever accept it without you making changes, and doesn't want you to have to change for her. It might just be stubbornness."

"I think for certain...Ana is not a cold person. She was originally very cold to nikolai, but was abruptly snapped to her senses and she came back. I believe she is someone heavily influenced by other people and needs time to think her thoughts through...she. she yelled at Kolya...it was like they weren't even her words. Barely her voice. It was her dad's. Perhaps this is similar? She has taken a blunt tactic to save heartache, but may have a change of heart as her mind clears?"
 #37685  by Levi Persky
Levi's hands lowered as he peered through his fingers at Kyle.

"You... think so?"

He dropped his hands, looking a little hopeful.

"Yes... that could be it... she could be changing her mind right now. I haven't seen her for two nights."

But sighing then he said, "She also went and saw her ex... Florian... to ask his advice or something. Who does that? Unless there are bad intentions? I would never go to Viola or..." He looked up thoughtfully... he didn't really have a long list of lovers to make a point about, and obviously he would be crazy to go to Viola, but still the point stood. "Or anyone I dated seriously..." he ended lamely. "She could have gone to Hera, or you even... I don't know. That just really hurt."
 #37686  by Kyle Bowden
"I can understand why that hurts." He sighed, and then went silent for a moment as he thought about those implications.

"You wouldn't go to Viola...but I think you would go to Zara, if you really needed to. Of course, you've come to me in this instance, but I don't think it would be unreasonable for you to go to Zara; why wouldn't you want advice or input from one of the only other people who have known you so intimately? With Ana? Well...er..."

He grimaced. It was definitely not so easy to explain, though he soon found an idea. Picking up his poetry book, he held it up to Levi.

"Okay, so I have been reading a lot of Lavender Gray recently, and here me out on this because I might just be excited about it and want to talk at length, but there is a point. So Gray has a lot of dark and dull poetry; they're emotive and provocative and jarring. In her darkest poetry, she manifests her feelings and thoughts into the forms of humans, or speaks to them as methods of closure, to help bandage the trauma she's been through. I think in a way...maybe Ana does the same but with actual people."

He put the book back down.

"What I mean is - Florian is a part of a huge chapter of her life; living in Germany, being away from her family and then reconnecting with them, overcoming near-death several times, and perhaps one of her most prominent break ups. As much as you perhaps don't want to recognise it, Florian has helped to shape the woman she is today. It might be the case that she hasn't yet found someone to help guide her here yet, and unfortunately, you can't be that person because that's where the arguments are."

"Believe me, Levi, life and death situations make people closer than anything I've seen before. People always look at me funny because I trust Dice - o I trust him with my feelings, affection, love, or best interest? Fuck, no. But I trust him with my life. She's never had a bond like that before, I'm sure, and hopefully will never have to again. But you also have to remember..."

He cleared his throat.

"Florian is perhaps her only friend completely away from you. You have a multitude of people to speak to regarding this issue, and that's great. But Ana has...nobody. Everybody she knows is through you. And although in the majority of ways it's backwards for her to take advice from an ex, she clearly went back there for a sense of comfort and familiarity, a reminder of what she once was and how far she's come. But...she also told you. I think that, had it been more sinister, she wouldn't have..."
 #37697  by Levi Persky
"Well I asked... she didn't volunteer that," said Levi grimly. He sighed, then added, "I wish I could agree with you so that all this made sense. I wouldn't have gone to Zara. To me that would have been the worst idea. And I would have expected Ana to blow up and give me the cold shoulder for weeks if she found out. And I wouldn't blame her. I wouldn't go to Zara... but even more so I wouldn't if I had been the one to end things with her, and I knew she was still holding a candle for me. even if I did go to Zara, which I wouldn't, that is comparing apples to oranges."

Looking at Kyle then he said, "You know... you really aren't helping by telling me how she has some sort of bond with her ex that she will never have with me. I don't even know why you think I have a multitude of people I can turn to. I am more of an introvert then she is. Do you know who I have? Hugh my cousin. That's it. And he wasn't home so I came here. Because at least you sort of know about what is going on. I don't have friends. She actually has friends other then Florian, not to mention a brother she is close to."
 #37698  by Kyle Bowden
Kyle lifted a brow.

"It's not my job to make you feel better; it's to give you perspective and possible outcomes. The same with the experiments - I'm not there to tell you what you want to hear. I'm there to give additional thoughts and views, offer ideas and methods of help." He spoke plainly before shrugging.

"Yes, perhaps you're right in that you wouldn't go to Zara, then. Maybe you don't have as many people. But it isn't about the truth, is it? We're not trying to speak the plain fact because, quite frankly, she evidently doesn't even know them. We're doing the very difficult task of trying to think of hypothesis to why she did it."

He stood, then, starting to pace. He brought his fingers to his lips, thinking before speaking again.

"It's definitely unusual for her to be doing this. Perhaps...perhaps we should go speak to Florian?" He offered, giving Levi a look.
 #37708  by Levi Persky
Levi's face darkened a moment, but finally he said, "You think... that could help?" HE sighed,then looking doan he said, "That sounds so embarrassing... and speaking of which.."

Looking Kyle in the eyes he said, "Could you keep this between us? Until we are certain she won't change her mind about trying to work on our marriage? I don't want it getting out to everyone. If she should change her mind, it might make a lot of people look at her and our relationship differently and.. I think there is enough strain already."
 #37709  by Kyle Bowden
Kyle took a breath, but nodded.

"Between us." He confirmed.

"Perhaps speaking to Florian isn't the first step,but it's maybe one to consider eventually. Like you said, it's already been two days so maybe when you go home, she'll be there waiting for you, wanting to talk it over." He said hopefully. "Then there won't be need for any embarrassment...not that it should be embarrassing but...Well, let's burn that bridge when we get to it."
 #37721  by Levi Persky
"Shouldn't I?" said Levi sadly. "In the grand scheme of things we have hardly been married for any significant time at all. And already she wants out..."

He paused a moment, thinking over the things she said, before saying, "She listed the reasons she was not happy with me... but she went further to talk about herself. How she didn't like things she saw in her. She felt she was a hypocrite, selfish, and mostly it all had to do with not being able to get pregnant naturally. She said she would do anything in the world to get pregnant.... almost. And she was upset because she felt she nearly compromised her morals to do it."

Levi shook his head and said, "I just don't understand... Or maybe I do, but I don't want to face it. She gave me a real psychological smack in the face at the end. Said she thought she would go off, be single, and maybe find a way to have a baby as a single mother. It really feels like..."

Levi paused again as everything began to click into place. He stared back at Kyle for a moment, mouth slightly open before he said, "She is telling me she married me to have children naturally, and now that this is off the table, she has no use for me. She almost said that word for word, only I wasn't hearing it at the time. I always saw this obsession in her as just her being sweet and motherly. She was always so insecure about it. I assured her time and time again that as much as I wanted children, I was perfectly happy adopting. I always supported her, never held anything against her. But she is doing that to me. I tried everything to give her her dream, but I couldn't magically cause her to get pregnant naturally. And that's why she married me. And if she is going to adopt well... she would rather do it as a single lady."

Levi looked away, tearing pricking his eyes. Finally he nodded and said, "I think I will visit Florian, if only to get a little more clarity on what I believe. If this is how she feels well... I wouldn't have much self respect trying to beg her to stick around. She needs help. mental help. but she never really saw me as a husband and partner that could give it to her. I was just her sperm bank. I guess this is how she must have felt when she was rejected by her ex for not being able to get pregnant. The irony..."
 #37742  by Kyle Bowden
Kyle swallowed.

"Well it...it certainly looks like that could be a possibility. But..." He cringed. "She doesn't seem like someone to go into it purposely...as in, maybe she hadn't realised that was what she wanted - but then again, does that even make it any better? No. Not really."

He rested his chin on the palm of his hand, staring out in thought before speaking again.

"You know...it could be less about you than you think. She said that your medical profession is causing her great distress, but they're also what will give her everything she's ever wanted. She's said it goes against her morals to do that...so maybe breaking up with you isn't a case of having no use for you, but knowing that eventually she will crack and give into temptation to have the child. Maybe whilst she adopts alone, she will never be tempted by the 'what if' of what you could have given her every day. She's taking the option away from herself, completely."

He shrugged.

"Just a thought. She clearly doesn't understand the nature of medical science...I do believe that if she did understand, she wouldn't leave you...or...maybe she would, regardless. Maybe she would still think it's barbaric. But I just can't help but think - and I apologise for being devil's advocate here - but I can't help but think that she doesn't actually have these beliefs. That these thoughts have manifested in her head due to the way she was brought up. Everybody knows how medicine works; you need to experiment to find things out and advance what you have, even I know that. But her entire morale base is built up on 'don't harm a dead body'. Why? Why is it so prominent?"

He bit his lip.

"I don't know why I'm considering all this right now; it's not really relevant. But it is interesting. I do think this has more to do with her than you...and I do think she loves you. I don't believe it's all some elaborate plot..."
 #37759  by Levi Persky
"If she loved me she would want to be with me regardless. She would want to raise a child with me. I only started with the experimenting again because I was trying to give her what she wanted." He shook his head. "I don't understand. If she doesn't want to do it she doesn't need to. I have never pushed this. I have only tried to make her happy. I have explained over and over how practical medicine works. I'm just... I'm most hurt by the fact that she doesn't even want to try. When we were both dating we shared that we thought marriage vows were important, sacred, even her own family thinks this. I don't feel she is echoing their thoughts on the matter, but her own. I mean I really don't. You say this doesn't sound like her, but it does. Not the part about divorcing me with out giving us a chance, but that part about feeling squeamish about something. And the truth is... she gets along with me fine as long as I agree with her entirely. The few times I have had an opinion different from hers she has gone into dramatics and wanted to break up. I mean here I am pretending this is so new but.." Levi glanced at Kyle, looking a little abashed, then said,

"It actually is like her. When someone she is with disagrees with her she gets upset, and gives up very easily. Wants to end things unless they take it back from what I have seen. Which is probably why we need couples counseling but, like I said, she would have non of it."

Levi took a few thoughtful sips of tea, then said, "If she does want to try again... I am going to have to insist we do some sort of counseling. And she should probably see someone on her own as well. But I don't know if that will just set her off again and destroy any chance..."

Looking curiously at Kyle then he said, "Maybe... maybe you could talk to her? One on one, see what she is thinking... maybe mention such things. IT could be better coming from you."
 #37784  by Kyle Bowden
Kyle hesitated; he remembered the last time he was asked to speak to her. He was thinking more than ever that he and Levi must be more than just work-partners; they were closer to actual friends at this point.

"I...I suppose I could. Maybe having another person give another perspective may help her see clarity and not just fall into the same rash decision making pattern."

He sat back. "Hopefully it will set her straight and give her a minute to think it over properly."
 #37785  by Levi Persky
"Thanks..." said Levi, looking as if some of the weight had fallen from his shoulders. He yawned, then said, "I don't think I will go home for now. She made it clear she doesn't want to see me. I will probably get a room at a hotel."

Levi took a few more sips of tea, then said, "Perhaps I am just not meant to be married. This is two failures in that regard. There is something to being alone. I thought I was happier with someone but... maybe I have been diluting myself. I had no idea how miserable she was. I suppose I am not a very good husband."