A Magical Roleplaying Experience 

 #37885  by Evelyn Winters
 
Location: Vera and Evelyn's Home • Date: Spring 2004


Shutting the door quietly behind her, having lead Emerson upstairs and into her room without exchanging a single word to one another. Evelyn turned around slowly, her back pressed against the cold wood of the door. Peering at her friend, the woman seemed to be working on autopilot. She barely seemed to recognize that Evelyn had all but dragged her away from her girlfriend without even saying a word to any of the woman currently in her home. Emerson had barely even twitched when she had taken her hand, though the woman's gaze didn't falter, even as she had let go of her to shut the bedroom door.

Evelyn understood this response though, having reacted quite similarly when news of Elaine's 'death' had reached her. It didn't matter than Emerson had fallen out of love with this man, and had signed the paper that confirmed their divorce not six months ago. She had still shared a very large chunk of her life with this man, a man who had helped create two very kind and smart boys who were going to be absolutely rocked by this news. Emerson might not be in love with him any more, but she had loved him once, and that still mattered, even Evelyn knew that.

Realizing she would have to be the one to break Emerson from this stupor. The woman didn't have the time nor the opportunity to carry on like Evelyn had. Emerson had two sons who would need their mother to at full capacity, at least when the news was given to them. After, Evelyn would happily let the brunette retreat into herself if need be, but right now, Emerson couldn't afford to be a shell of herself.

So stepping forward, she cupped her friend face in both her hands, fingers placed delicately in the space between jaw and ear, thumbs spread carefully across cheekbones, and gently kissed her friend on the lips before resting her forehead against Emerson's.

"Emerson," She said quietly, "I'm so, so, sorry." And letting the tears of grief she felt for her friend, fall from her eyes, lowered one arm so she could wrap it around her friend and pull her in closer.
 #37901  by Emerson Toscano
 
Emerson barely realized that she was being dragged away from Emily. She blinked and suddenly she was in Vera and Evelyn's room. When had she last been here? When Elaine had resurrected from the dead? How quaint? Julian wouldn't have that luxury. Somehow she felt even angrier at Elaine.

Emerson frowned as she felt hands framing her features. Evelyn's face blurred as it approached her. Their lips touched and she felt as though the blur had penetrated her blood vessels.

Something had been awakened. It emerged from a part of her that was covered in dust and cobwebs. A part of her soul she had walked away from a long time ago.

"What are you doing?" She accused though she did not move. They were back to a decade prior when Evelyn had lost Elaine. They had shared an intimacy then that Emerson had blamed on shared grief and pain. Emerson would not allow herself to go back there. She held the front of Evelyn's silk robes. "I can't, I can't," she hiccuped.
 #37949  by Evelyn Winters
 
Rubbing her palm up and down the woman’s back softly, feeling the muscle and bones ripple beneath her touch as Emerson began to unravel before her.

“It’s okay,” She shushed her friend, thumb tracing the woman’s hip bone as she continued to hold her. “It’s okay. I’m here. For as long as you need me to be. Just..let it out,” Evelyn murmured while feeling like she was suffering from some bizarre déjà-vu experience. They’d been here before, only their roles had been reversed. Evelyn had broken immediately upon touching Emerson. She had wailed and cried for a whole night. Cursing everything and everyone. Hating herself. Resenting herself. Then when she had no more tears left to shed she had just stopped. Stopped talking. Stopped thinking. Stopped moving. She had just stopped. It had taken days before Emerson had managed to get a single response out of her and it had taken Emerson threatening to get medical help before Evelyn had finally spoken.

Emerson was stronger than her though. Always had been. She also had two boys who were counting on their mother being strong for them. Emerson would have to grieve now, openly, loudly, visibly before they left if she was going to be what they needed.

“Just let it out,” She repeated, lifting a hand to guide Emerson’s head to her shoulder. “Then we will get the boys and you’ll come back here. Okay? We will tell them here.”
 #37956  by Emerson Toscano
 
Finally, she relented. Her head rested on Evelyn's shoulder and once her arms were wrapped tightly around her friend she took a deep breath.

For the longest time, Julian and Evelyn had been her two fighting forces. Yes because they represented the two opposing forces in her life, but more than that, they were embodiments of her own constant internal battle. He was the side of her who wanted to settle and have a family. She was the part of her who wanted to fight the establishment and every responsibility it imposed.

He was gone now and she felt as though the fight had left her.

"It was my fault," she breathed into Evelyn's neck as finally, her shoulders started quivering. She knew the boys would think it. Alessio would probably even say it.
 #37986  by Evelyn Winters
 
"Emerson," She said, grip tightening on her friend, fingers digging into the flesh beneath. "No, stop. That is not true and you know it." Julian's death was not Emerson's fault. The man had never lead a very healthy life style, and not even magic could prevent the damage years of binge drinking and overeating. Of course, Evelyn had never expected those had habits to kill him, at least not this early, but he had and that was not at all Emerson's fault.

Moving her hand up to run her fingers through Emerson's hair, she kissed the woman on the side of her head, "Julian had a heart attack and that is not your fault. Do you hear me?"
 #38001  by Emerson Toscano
 
"No, it's-it's," she babbled.

Evelyn couldn't understand and it would be an insult to attempt to explain. She had suffered through her own guilt when Elaine had been taken. Emerson could not bring herself to verbalize the guilt she felt. Her guild was laughable when compared to Evelyn's, but it was there nonetheless and it was valid.

Leaving Julian had broken him. He had never been able to move past the destruction of his family. Beyond that, she had fought with him the night he had died. More than that, she had provoked him.

"I fought with him about Easter. Just to make him angry," she admitted in the crook of her friend's neck.
 #39340  by Evelyn Winters
 
Lifting a hand to brush Emerson’s hair out of her face, Evelyn took a moment to think about the woman’s question.

How did Emerson tell her son’s that their father had died. Evelyn could only think back to when her mother had died and the owl she had received from her father. The words, though written, has been completely void of emotion. He had even signed it with his signature as if writing to his daughter was akin to writing to one of his correspondence. Evelyn and decided then and there, staring at the immaculate writing that only belonged to her father, that she wouldn’t be going home for the funeral. In a few short seconds she had already grieved her mother and her still breathing father.

Emerson wasn’t her father though and how ever she went about it, it would be ten times better than what he had done.

“Well, I don’t think there’s any easy way to do it really. It’s going to hurt no matter what, but just being there for them is going to help.” Swiping at Emerson’s cheek with her thumb, collecting a tear on her nail, she breathed in and out and then slowly moved away.

“I’m gonna change and then we can go okay?”
 #39346  by Emerson Toscano
 
Emerson nodded. Instead of leaving the bedroom to offer her friend privacy, she moved to the bed. Being in the same room as Evelyn offered a reassurance she desperately needed. Emerson sat on the bed and stared in the distance. Evelyn was right. There was no easy way to tell them. From here on out and for the near future, everything would be difficult.